First, the good news. Today is Halloween, which means you get the chance to dress up and scare people senseless. Chances are you won’t even need to go out and buy a costume—just pick something from the wardrobe that your partner refuses to let you wear outside.
Health warning: Even though it’s getting quite warm, please choose an outfit that covers most of your body. The idea is to scare everyone, not scar them for life.
You also get the chance to give away all the stuff in your pantry that your entire family refuses to eat, including the dog. (It’s the main reason trick-or-treating happens at night.)
And now the bad news. After today, you really are going to have to clean up the yard.
You’ve been lucky so far. You’ve managed to stave off protests from your partner, your neighbours and the Environment Protection Authority by telling them, “It’s for Halloween”. You even started writing “R.I.P.” on all your pizza boxes before throwing them into the grass, which is now waist high.
Of course, the chances of anyone actually making it up the path to your front door are highly remote. In fact, about the only way they could get there is if they were dressed as The Grim Reaper and carrying a working scythe.
But after today you’ll have to cut/slash the grass, collect the pizza box, and possibly reunite long-lost children with their families.
Fortunately, Brizzy Rubbish Removals can help you get rid of it all. (Okay, most of it. You’ll have to deal with the kids yourself.) They’ll bring a truck, load up all your rubbish, and take it away. You don’t even need to be there when they do it.
Which is probably just as well, because chances are a lot of people will be lining up to talk to you now that your path is clear.